Monday, May 11, 2009

Everyone Happy Here

Epistle XIV: Contrary to Cominal Rumor, I did not Drown much!

Puey, oh dearest Prince, oh light of mine eyen, oh apple to my lips, oh pulse of mine heart,
Your Mother is making me write this letter. Actually everyone is making me write at the moment. Grandmother Tàltiin right now is mixing the ink. Auntie Qtìmine has summoned several messengers to bring this epistle to you at once with all honor and speed. Grandmother Xhàtrajhil is present also. They’re going to send Fhermáta on a vessel being prepared at the moment so she may hand it to you with her own hand. Your Mother believes that if Fhermáta gives you the message than you will act on it.
Your Mother is standing o'er my shoulder. She is watching the way that my finger holds the quill. Sometimes she makes me nervous. Wait, I’m not finished with this page I’m

Puîyus, this is your glorious and beautiful Mother. It is immaterial to me whether you become Chieftain or Emperor or Grand Poet Warrior of Grand Poet Warriors. I’m still your Mother, and I’m telling you, do not return home! Your responsibility is to the troops at the battle. We shall only win the war if you remain upon the frontier. I forbid you to return home. We’re taking care of the Princess, give me that page back! I’m not finished ordering my Son around, I’m still

Puey, I’ve got the page back. I wish your Mother would not watch me as if I were some insect being studied. This isn’t the first time I’ve almost drowned

Puîyus, don’t listen to anything that the Princess writes. I’m your Mother. My words are the ones important to you. Éfhelìnye did not almost drown. This is all being exaggerated. Why doesn’t anyone care about what I have to say? I’m the Matriarch of this Clan, I’m the most important person in all this family, I’m the one taking care of your Sisters and Bride, but does anyone listen to me? Does anyone care that I’ve been burdhened with an hyper little ballerina waif who talks about weird linguistic constructions and occasionally knocks down the wall to a bedroom with rope and gear and almost drowns herself in the

Puey, don’t read anything that your Mother has written. She only exaggerates a billion, billion fold and every single second of the day. She has absolutely no sense of proportion. I, your beloved Grandmother Xhàtrajhil, am the only one in this barely functional family who can see with eyen unclouded. Your Mother couldn’t protect a single Princess if the entire Empire depended on it, that’s why I’ve decided to move into the crannog of the Ancestors and take command of this family.

Pew, I’m giving the paper back to Éfhelìnye. Everyone’s shouting right now, and the Princess needs to write to you right now if I’m going to be bale to deliver this to you with mine own hand.

Give me that paper! I’m the Mother, I should be the one writing the letter. I’m sending Qtìmine away. Can’t you make yourself useful for a change! Summon more messengers and acolytes or something. I don’t know! Just do something!

Puey, I’m giving this sheet back to the Princess. I hope she writes very quickly.

My dearest heir, Puey
I wish for you to ignore all of the above messages. Your Mother is still under the delusion that she is in charge of our Family, but rest assured she is not. She always has thought that she had some power in the family. She has none whatsoever. Your Father, when he was just a few years older than you, had it in his mind, for some fey reason that I’ve never quite understood, that he wished to be married unto a tisweqhìmla temple dancer, and he just had had to be married to one who has absolutely no sense whatsoever. And who invited Xhàtrajhil into my house? What’s she going to do, flood the house with slaves and then slaves to the slaves and then slaves to the slaves to the slaves? I’ll see whether I can’t distract her with a game of chess.
I’ll eventually give the papyrus back to the Princess.

I have the paper back, my dearling, my beloved. Now, your Mother is making me sit in her lap so that she can see every single word that I paint. I’m commanded to tell you that your Mother is the wisest and most beautiful and most lissome of all the women of

Puîyus, I don’t like the way the Princess is describing me. She is my pious Daughter in Law. I own her! She is my personal property! Doesn’t she understand that

Grandson, I’ve decided to ban your Mother from writing e'er again. She has the tendancy to write exactly what she’s saying, and to say exactly what she is thinking. Sigh. Yes, I audibly sigh. Is there any way I can send your Mother off unto the frontier? I’m running out of paper here.
Grandmother T–

Puey my love, I was just using the words that your Mother told me to paint and


Has it occurred unto any of you that you’re frightening the dearest little divine Princess? We must remember that she spent the first eleven years of her life in the purity of isolation. And why is everyone grabbing the sheet of papyrus and writing on it? If dearest Puey is even able to decypher all of this, he must surely think that he is born of quite an eccentric group of


Puîyos, I’ll have you know that I’m sending both of my Daughters away. Please disregard anything that either your Mother or your Aunt Samájhi has to say. Right now one of my Daughters is weeping and the either is dancing about and blaiming everyone else. They were like this as little girls also. Is there anyway you can win this war very quickly, as soon as Íngìkhmar returns, your Mother will have to start listening to someone. I’m sending forth some of my slaves to ensure that this letter reach you safely and, give that back to me! Siêthiyal! Don’t you play around me! I’m not in the mood for

Say, Brother! Are the pirates getting me my dancing shoon? Your dearest younger Sister just longs to see you again and to dance for her brother. Fhérma! Leave me alone, I’m trying to connive Puey to

Puey, Mamà is stomping back into the room. I’m going to try and distract her so that Éfhelìnye can actually write you a letter. I just want you to know that you are not to return home, for we have everything under control and Éfhelìnye is quite safe in our hands and

My beloved future Lord and Husband,
This is just brief letter that I’m writing to you. I wish to inform you that I pray for your safety and weep for you everynight, and that I am quite honored to have honored Khwofheîlya as my Mother by marriage. I respect and love her with all mine heart, and she is doing the best job possible in making me a bride suitable to her only Son whom she loves above all else. In fact, I’m being forced to write that Khwofheîlya is my ideal Mother by marriage, and that

[several smudges]

truly love your Mother and enjoy my stay here with her. And your honored Mother commands me to write that she who bore you and loves you the best and has always taken care of this Clan still thinks that it would be in your best interest and indeed of the entire Springtide Imperium that we are forming that you forge alliances with the powerful families who shall become the new Noble Caste and that you take unto yourself wives and concubines and

[several more smudges]

I’m not writing this! Puey, your Mother’s trying to make me write that

Son, I under this little infatuation you have with the Princess, but the fact of the matter is that


I’m not writing this! Puey, you’re mine and I refuse to permit




Puey, I’ve managed to send everyone else save the Princess away. It is at times like this that I am quite happy to be the oldest Sister, for occasionally I can be clever enough to induce our younger Siblings to distract our Parents. All I had to do was pour some khmèsen acorn butter upon Kàrula’s head, and within a few moments she and Siêthiyal and Ixhúja were chasing about each other and bursting out into the yard. Our Grandmas and Mamà dashed after her. I think Auntie Qtìmine’s in here, I’m not sure, sometimes she’s so quiet we just forget about her. Oh look, Ixhúja’s found some jhyèpet rice noodles and is splattering Siêthiyal. This should keep the entire family distracted long enough for the Princess to write you a brief epistle. Very short, of course, because I have to leave with the messengers within the hour.

My beloved Puey,
Sometimes I don’t think that your family likes me. I don’t really feel in the mood to write, but I promised to write to you and teach you language, and a Princess of the holy ichor of Pwéru cannot turn her back on her word.
While we were on the subject of íjukh phonologia vokalik, I wish to discuss lwaxhwéto, that is, onomatopoeia. Since the Babel language was created by a child, the language has some of the rough edges and idiosyncratic features of a child, and perhaps it did not undo the normal processes of linguistic development which language should have taken if the Immortals themselves at the Dawn of Time had created it as the instrument of the alchemy of the Land. I remember when I first met you and used to press my fingers upon your lips and help you to form the sounds, and you told me, oh my one true love, Íngìkhmar’s Son, that you hypothesized that some words had their origin in the abstraction of their sounds. I do not know whether this is true. The Wise would have debated it, and yet when I consider some words I cannot help but think that their genesis must lie in lwaxhwéto, in onomatopoeia.
Consider: Fhérm, those who look with wonder, awe (upon someone/something), Plórpe, those who drip, are squishy, slippery, who plop, fizz, Puî, those who are perfumed, fragrant, heady smelly, good smelling, enchanting, ahuiyac, bonodora, Ùrpa, ùrpat, wolcen clouds, and Xhrúm, xhrúmum, darkleness, an example of darkleness. Such participle particles do invoke in me certainly the feeling of sound.
However, other particples are clearly meant to represent certain sounds, and these can more formally be classified as lwaxhwéto. Here is a list of some which occur unto me:

Fhekekekékekh tho who make a sound like gummi frogs; Þe sound of gummi frogs
Fhìrem tho who growl, snarl
Fhláyekh tho who pfall, splat, plop; Þe sound of somewhom/somewhat juicy hitting a hard surface
Fhrúm tho who explode; make a noise like explosions; Þe sound of explosions
Fhwìni tho who squeak, squeal; Þe sound of squeaking, squealing
Fhwùyo tho who howl, ululate; sound of howling, ululacioun
Fhyòwu tho who snarl; sound of snarling
Jhiîjhii tho who make a sound like birds; Þe sound of birds
Jhkhùnwo tho who make a sound, a noise (pred nom)
Jhún Þe sound of silence; tho who are silent, quiet
Khàjhin sound of braying (of an aardvark ør dinosaur); tho who bray like an aardvark ør dinosaur
Khàkhqexhang tho who sneeze; Þe sound of sneezing
Khànxhutse tho who sound nasal, who talk through Þe nose
Khèstui tho who gargle, of rhythmick flowing water; tho who make Þe sound of gargling, of rhythmick flowing water, aálilomáa
Khlètijo tho who splash (somewhom/somewhat); sound of splashing
Khletwètwe rain on leaves, sound of rain on leaves, lalimilom
Khmárnwu Traîkhiim throat·singing; tho who throat·psing, warble, yoddle
Khmàryor bleating (as of Silkworms ør sheep); tho who bleat; Þe sound of bleating
Khméme tho who make a sound like silkworms ør sheep; Þe sound of silkworms ør sheep
Khmiîrmpe tho who moan, murmur, complain; Þe sound of moaning
Khminewáwa tho who make a sound like wind rustling in pinetrees; Þe sound of wind
Khmómo tho who make a sound like cattle, aurochs kine; Þe sound of cattle, aurochs kine
Khmúr murmur; tho who murmer; sound of murmuring
Khmúrur tho who grumble, mumble; sound of grumbling, mumbling
Khmùta, khmùtamet tho who moan, make a sound like ‘rrargh’
Khmutweiyaûkhta tho who make a sound like water bubbling, rippling, rhythmick waves; Þe sound of water, of rhythmick waves, aálilomáan
Khnènya Meowing, mewing, mīmī, nyā·nyā; tho who meow like a cat
Khneûma distant cry, call; tho who cry, call from a distant
Khnìyau tho who make a sound like cats; Þe sound of cats, mīmī, nyā·nyā
Khnujhwìjhwi rain on roof, sound of rain on roof, lalilom
Khriîrnu mocioun of leaves in wind, flapping of birds’ wingfins, idle chatter, giggling; tho who make Þæt noise
Khwawàmla loud laughter, cachinnatory laughter; tho who laugh loudwise
Koâkh tho who make a sound like gummi frogs; Þe sound of gummi frogs
Lwàwa sighing; tho who sigh
Pàlpu, pàlpur tho who murmur; Þe sound of murmuring
Páng sound of firecracker exploding: tho who explode
Pfhiikatálapu growls, rumblen, secret words, Gibberish
Pfhóror tho who purr like a cat; Þe sound of purring
Pòkhra tho who roar; a sound like roaring
Pòqro tho who make a sound like rattling; Þe sound ør rattling
Pùltoqe sound of vigorouswise stirred water; tho who vigorouswise stir water
Pùrngpa tho who pfall onto Þe floor; sound of an object falling on floor; noise of chopping wrood
Qakhéxher laughter of childers, women; tho who chirp, giggle, chirm, cluck, whhhinny, whhhicker
Qakhóxhar laughter of men; tho who boom, rumble, bumble, thunder, resound
Qàkhqakh tho who laugh; Þe sound of laughter
Qèjha sound of a door opening; (of doors) Þæt open
Qoqeqóqo tho who make a sound like rooster raptors; Þe sound of atsáya rooster raptors
Qthàrnya tho who howl, ululate from far away; Þe sound of howling, ululacioun
Qwèqweka Quack quack! Þe sound of ducks; tho who quack; Qwèqweka, a wolf
Qyèrtyekha tho who walk on leaves ør twigs; Þe sound of walking on leaves, twigs
Sathátha slapping, whhhirling sound (as of waves against rock, as of bird’s wingfins); tho who make Þæt sound
Sefhíju cracks, crashes, crashing sounds; tho who make crashing sounds [part·power·sound]
Sìjuyu, sijùjuyu tho who groan; sound of groaning
Sùsur soft susurracioun; tho who make Þe sound of soft whhhispering
Syaqhasyáqha tho who make a sound like birds; Þe sound of birds
Tàtat Spitting of plantimals, especialwise of kittens; tho who make Þæt sound
Thèxhwu, thèxhwuwu tho who moan; Þe sound of moaning
Thìkhi, thìkhimet tho who hiß, snarl; sound of hißing, snarling
Thòqyi eliding Þe last syllababel ør part of a wørd, apocope, hiccoughs; tho who do such, tho who hiccough
Thùngqu Thunk! Tho who make a sound like Thunk!
Thwákh Thwack! Tho who make a sound like Thwack!
Thwìtqa snow crackling noise; tho who make Þe sound of snow crackling
Thyòji, thyòjiji tho who chirp, pipe; sound of chirping, piping
Tikhíkhi laughter, Þe sound of laughter, tho who laugh
Tìngting tintinabulacioun, sound of bells; tho who tintinabulate
Tlhàtqi tho who sneeze; sneezes; sound of sneezing
Tlhíwe sound of wind blowing, especialwise in a clear sky; (of wind) to blow, especialwise in a clear sky
Tofhyàrnyi tho who murmur, grumble, hold a grudge against (somewhom/somewhat)
Tqèqa coughing; tho who cough
Tsúm humming, buzzing, tho who hum, buzz
Tyàpu, tyàtyapu tho who grunt; sound of grunting
Tyéjhing tho who tap bead coins to make hem ring; Þe sound of ringing bead coins
Wthítho piping, Þe sound of lwaût bagpipes, skirring; tho who make such a sound, skirl
Wtsitsetsítsi tho who make a sound like birds; Þe sound of birds
Xèxaum stridulacioun, shrill grating, chirping, hißing by rubbing body parts like insects ond Qlùfhem Aûm ond Thùlwu Aûm; tho who stridulate
Xhiqtákem tho who make a sound like a clock; Þe sound of a clock
Xhìxha Hiß of plantimals, especialwise of cats; tho who hiß Þæt way
Xhlénga wet hair, wet fur, wet pfeathren; Þe sound of wet hair, wet fur, wet pfeathren
Xhthuîn tho who make a sound, rustle, whhhicker, are sonorous, dulcet
Xhùxhaxho tho who hiß; sound of hißing
Xhwáwa tho who make a sound like coyotes, duckbill platypodes; Þe sound of coyotes ør duckbill platypodes
Xiêfhta tho who roar; Þe sound of roaring, countinous loud noise
Xìxhaxikh hiccoughs; tho who hiccough
Xòxoam crepitacioun, grating ør crackling sound such as rubbing bone together; tho who crepitate

One may also add to this list the level seven suffix -ethwet, which means X makes a noise like (the root). I shall discuss the use of affixes later, my beloved.

Interjections are level eight suffixes, and they seem to me to be vaguely onomatopoeick in nature, although they make no attempt at representing any specific sound:

·akhwa Therethither! Aha! (Complecioun)
·ekhwe Whhhat? Euwell? (Surprise)
·ikhwi Goodly! (Pleasure)
·okhwo Hey! Whhhat! (Annoyance)
·ukhwu Sorry! Alas! (Sorrow, regret)
·aikhwai Lo! Behold! (Wonder)

+ Aiyo Alack, alas (Sigh, lamentacioun)
+ Akhan Alack, alas! (Sigh, lamentacioun)
+ Aqha Ah! Ne! (Fear)
+ Eiya On! Upana! Away! Eia
+ Ekheu Ouch! (Complaint)
+ Elel Ah!
+ Ewokhei Evoe!
+ Fharkh Ah!
+ Fhe Alas! Ve! Mo chreach!
+ Fhloe Hi, Hello, Goodbye, Ciao!
+ Fhus Rats! Fooey! Whhhat a meß! Fuŝ! Quel damage!
+ Fhwa La! Fa! Oh! Ah! Beep! (Whhhimsy)
+ Fhwii Lad! Laß! (Cute, diminutivë, effeminate)
+ Iipa Aaaah! (Fear, terror)
+ Jau Eh? (Perhaps, maybe, hypothetical, probabwise)
+ Joe Meh? (Allegedwise, zo called, ne direct gnoweliche)
+ Kaixhe Ah! Lo! Hi·Keeba! (Awe)
+ Kerjungqa Ah!
+ Khae Hey! Hi!
+ Khaôqha Hail! Ave!
+ Khasyakh Huzzah! Hurray!
+ Khautlhi Hi, Hello, Goodbye, Ciao!
+ Khei Hey!
+ Kheinanináni Hey!
+ Khmaum Hmmm… (Calm)
+ Khnáni Hey!
+ Khne Hey therethither! (Friendship)
+ Khoyótokho Hey!
+ Khwaet Ah! Lo! Rowrbazzle! (Awe)
+ Khyapunta Ah!
+ Khyokho Hi, Hello, Goodbye, Ciao!
+ Lroe I’m sorry, taatake responsibilty for (Polite, respectful)
+ Lwa La! Fa! Oh! Ah! (Whhhimsy)
+ Lwar Loverly! Beloved! (Love, devoacioun)
+ Oiyo Alack, alas (Sigh, lamentacioun)
+ Okhon Alack, alas! (Sigh, lamentacioun)
+ Pát Hocus pocus, abracadabra, boo! (< Patifháru)
+ Pátifhar Hocus pocus, abracadabra, boo! (< Patifháru)
+ Pfhae I’m sorry, sympathize, empathize with (Sympathy, empathy)
+ Pui Stinky! Puey! (< Puî)
+ Pyárs Hail! Ave!
+ Qáyoakh Hail! Ave!
+ Qeu I’m sorry! I apologuise (Polite, respectful)
+ Qhae Jes, Þæt’s correct
+ Qhar Aha! Zo! (Curiosity)
+ Qhau Sir! (Adult, tough, masculine, bellicose)
+ Qhoe Ah! Please! (Humble)
+ Qlaixha Ah! Lo! Neß gadol! (Awe)
+ Qtoe Jes, I understand
+ Qui Of course! Kompreneble! (conviccioun, belief, I feel; hearsay evidential particle: X wæs informed, learned, X could, ‘tis general gnowledge Þæt)
+ Stae Woe! (Lamentacioun)
+ Tlhae Poor! Ah! (Compaßion, agope)
+ Tlhau Duh! (Obviouswise, patentwise obvious)
+ Tlhotlho Zo·zo. Kinda·sorta. Verŝajne, kvazaŭ (Seeming, apparent, untrusted source; inference evidential particle: X concluded, thunk, X may, might, hit seemeth, ‘tis chanted þæt, inferred)
+ Tqakh Yukh! Icky! (Disgust, dislike)
+ Tsae Hey! Yar rhight! wejpuH!(Informal, slang, sarcasm)
+ Tsau Thank you! (Gratitude)
+ Tseu Yup! Efektivë! (Certainly, perfectwise, I believe, I gnow, direct gnoweliche; direct evidential particle: X gnows Þæt, saw, heard, felt Þæt, X would)
+ Túreil Zo be hit, amen!
+ Tyae Hi, Hello, Goodbye, Ciao!
+ Uka Aaaah! (Fear, terror)
+ Uketi Aaaah! (Fear, terror)
+ Ulta Who cares? Zo whhhat?
+ Utlhei Okay, oll korrect, ceart gu leòr!
+ X x x (Clicking)
+ X x (Clicking)
+ X (Clicking)
+ Xhuxhu Huh? (Disbelief, quesciouning)
+ Xhwókh Ah! Woe! Selah! (Attencioun!)
+ Xhwupa Oooops!
+ Xoe Do’h! Ne! Hit can’t be! (Anger, frustracioun)
+ Xui Sir, Madam (Formal)

Oh Puey, oh my champion and prince and hero, I’m feeling a little tired now, so I don’t think that I will write too much more. As for injeterjections I am not entirely sure that their written form represents their underlying representation. I know that they are pronounced differently, perhaps with extraordinary difference among the various dialects, and perhaps when I’m feeling better and the war is one, I shall be able to determine the exact and wide range of pronounciation within Khniîxhwa itself. To use an example from the participles I listed above, khnènya khnènya, the sound of meowing, sometimes sounds to me more like nènya nènya, even though any natal speaker of Khniîxhwa shall think that he was pronouncing an initial Kh, since liquids must begin with a Kh as the first consonant in a word.
While I’m still awake, I shall write just a little about Clicking. We have an entire glyph to represent clicking, Xàyikh, the 18th letter of the alphasyllabic writing system, and whenever we just wish to represent clicking in writing we can just write xàyikh with a jáng explanation mark after it. The exact realization of the Babel clicking phoneme X varies from Immortal, Spirit, Mortal Species, Race, Nation, and Timeline. X in Khniîkha cultures usually resembled the tock! sound that one sometimes hears from Ravens and Crows, although this might be an affectation which my Father’s culture has developed. The Click is prounounced as a tounge smack or a low whistle, sometimes I hear it as a bilabial sound, a dental song, a postaveleolar cry, a palatoalveolar ripple, or an alveolar lateral laugh. Sometimes clicks I hear without any following vowel sound oat all. The clicking sound that an khlunáli dialect may use for its clicking interjection may not even be the same clicking sound that they use to represent the phoneme X. These clicking interjections may not even convay discreet emotion. Rather, each linguistic community or culture may chose a click or clicking rhythm to convay something particular unto them, say a form of cominal rhythm. For instance, we are well aware that the Traîkhiim are adpect at clicking interjections, and are able to convey applause, impatience, awe, taunting, hunger, boredom, &c by clicking. The Xhràkhlan spirits that we met before clicked for taunting. Sometimes I click when in deep creative thought. We write clicking like this: X! X! X! and we write the level eight suffixes as + X and +X x and +X x x.
Puey I have to lie down now. I’m feeling very tired. Please don’t worry about us here. Contrary to cominal rumor, I really did not drown too much, and I’m sure I’ll be back on my feet soon. I’m giving this letter to Fhermáta, I think she’ll copy it on the journey untowards you.
All my love. Éfha

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